Episode 85: How to Act Like an Adult

Okay okay, so a month in between posts. That's because I've been busy trying to officially Get. A. Life. Still no luck on that front but I did have a funny conversation recently with my world-famous friend Melanie! I saw her at a party and it was a very Nashville kind of party - you know, "come over to my house and listen to my friends sing!" And frankly, I've lived here twenty years and have tried every single day to avoid going to this very sort of thing but it was actually fun and good-hearted and the singers were really crazy-talented and there were, well, sausage balls and crockpot Swedish meatballs.

ANYWAY, there was funny Melanie, all bosomy and pleated in the dress department. And we were talking about how you go from being a not-adult to being an adult. And I was saying blah blah blah about how I think it's when you wake up and don't want IKEA furniture anymore, that what you really want is a four poster bed that looks like it was slept in by Andrew Jackson. And another friend chirped that for her it was not eating peanut butter crackers for dinner, that there were other things out there like seitan and tofu. But then Melanie chimed in: "I used to have this thing for hipster guys in tennis shoes. I would always fall for them. But then the other day I saw the handsomest guy and he was getting in his fancy car and I looked down and there they were: lace-up Converse. And I almost wanted to shout: would a nice penny loafer kill a man? And that's when I knew I was an adult."

Which just about sums it up, if you ask me.