Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Episode 17: How to Get Rid of a Wasp Nest

You should definitely have your bookmark-finger ready because this How To could be life-saving! Or you could die following my advice - probably from lung cancer because I advise smoking at one point. My own personal experience with this particular traumatic event was that I got to spend a lovely night in the hospital watching "The Strange Love of Martha Ivers" starring Barbara Stanwyck and eating a $74 ham sandwich., right? Afterwards, I got my very own personal Epi-pen, which I guess was supposed to make me feel more secure even though there's no way I'm jamming that giant needle into my thigh, I don't care how giant my face swells up. Also, it happened right before 9-11 and then when I was flying on a trip to the Grand Canyon the following October, the people at security confiscated the giant needle. When I protested - "But I'm allergic to bees!" - they deadpanned "Sir, they ain't no bees on the plane." So there I was at the Grand Canyon for four days, terrified of sudden bees. And also turquoise jewelry, which freaks me right out.

Thanks to Margaret Littman for suggesting this one.

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